Tag Archive: spirituality

It was only after I experienced suffering that I began to have compassion. I now see all the suffering in my past as beautiful, golden moments of extraordinary grace and love, allowing my heart to open and the Universe to come rushing in.

word cloud compassion

The All-That-Is and all that has happened and will happen within it is someone’s dream.

It is your dream.

You are the dreamer.

I am the dreamer.

I am you and you are me.

We are the dreamer.

All of us dream the dream together.

Together, we are The One Who Is All.

There need not be fear or sadness surrounding death. It’s the perfectly beautiful shedding of the body and release of the soul.

All Are One

The cells of your body are to you as the waves are to the ocean, as you are to all that is.

Separateness is an illusion.

I am the bird that flies.
I am the grass that blows in the wind.
I am the sun that shines.

I am the river
And the stone.
I am the earth
And the sky.

I am the Universe.
I am all things.

~Anya Phenix


Once you get to the place where the opinions of others no longer have power over you, you have a choice to either look at them with disdain, saying, “I don’t care what you think,” or to shower them with love because they are just as wonderful and special as you are.


What does your heart say?

In the course of leaving my family’s belief system and forging out on my own to find my truth, I’ve realized that for the most part a person can believe whatever they choose to believe. You can find arguments and proof to back almost any belief. So then the questions become, “What do I want to believe?” and “What do I know is true?” or “What is the best thing for me to believe?”

To answer this, I must look deep inside myself and feel the truth that I can be sure of. I’m now convinced that the only way to find my truth is to be silent, to hear my own heart.

And what does my heart say? It tells me to focus on love and peace, kindness and compassion. If I do this, I will find my way to truth.

For the majority of my life I was a fundamentalist Christian, because of this I still find myself looking externally to find meaning and direction in my life. I was taught that I am unworthy, imperfect, filled with sin, and that I must look to God and the Bible in order to find truth. My mom reminded me often as I was growing up that “the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” – Jeremiah 17:9. This effectively taught me not to trust myself, and to expect my own heart to intentionally mislead me.

New Orleans Mardi Gras night in the tourist se...

New Orleans Mardi Gras night in the tourist section of Bourbon Street: Fundamentalist Christian protesters carry signs and shout damnations in crowd of more secular revelers. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I realized about 3 years ago that there was something amiss in many of the things I had been taught as a Christian. I felt that love was the most important part of the message of Jesus, but when I looked around at the Christians I knew and as I read many parts of the Bible, the actions and message seemed to encourage judgment, criticism, exclusivity, and hate. The God of the Bible seemed to me to be petty and vindictive, rather than loving. The consequence of not believing that Jesus is The Only Son of God being an eternity of torment in hell seemed to me to be the opposite of what a loving God would plan.

The questioning had begun, and the further I got into researching the Bible and various translations, and the ways in which the books were put together, the less I believed it to be the infallible Word of God. There came a tipping point at which I realized that I didn’t believe in the central message anymore. I was no longer a Christian. And so began the search for my truth.

Looking for truth and enlightenment, I’ve researched many religions and belief systems, and various methods of meditation. I’ve scoured the internet for anything that might help me in my quest for truth.

A while back I posted that in my search for enlightenment, I felt the Universe telling me I should “stop looking everywhere else; everything you need is inside you.” In response to this insight, I stopped reading books telling me how to find enlightenment/become a shaman/learn how to meditate, and turned my searching toward experiential things. I tried using mind-altering binaural beats, legal plants and herbs, ceremonial cacao, and meditation for astral projection and lucid dreaming. The results have been mixed, but mostly disappointing.

Last night I was lamenting my inability to have a consistent transcendental experience, and the Universe spoke again. “You don’t need a transcendental experience; you need only to love.” It was then that I realized I hadn’t really heard the message the Universe had given me earlier. Everything I need is inside me. The most important spiritual experiences of my life have come when I was pouring out love on the world around me.

I have always been motivated by love. It is my heart’s desire to love all things. I have always felt this way, but my heart has been called wicked by my mom, the Bible, and Christianity.

Love is the only solution.

Love is the only solution. (Photo credit: christiantimeless)

Today I take my heart back. I deem my heart pure, beautiful, trustworthy, and wonderful. Love is my calling. Love is what will lead me to enlightenment. When I focus on loving everyone and everything, I will find my truth and my path.

Love is my message. Love is my superpower.

I had just formally renounced Christianity, citing an inability to believe in a God who would create humans only to sentence the majority of them to an eternity of pain and suffering – among other issues I have with traditional Christian beliefs. I knew in my heart that love was the most important thing in this world, and the only thing worth pursuing. I was reading everything I could find on eastern and pagan religions, and searching for anything else that emphasized respect for the natural world and love. I was trying to fill the void that leaving my religion of 30+ years had left. One by one I tried to fit myself into each of them, but for one reason or another, none of them felt right.

Then one day when I was desperately searching the internet for something else to try, I heard a still, small voice say:

Stop looking everywhere else; everything you need is inside you.

And that’s where I found peace. I instinctively knew this was my answer. I don’t need to be part of an organized religion or belief system. I can simply choose to walk in love and compassion toward all things, and listen to the Source (the Divine, the Great Spirit, my higher self, or whatever else people may call it) for guidance. So I’ve been doing this for the past 6 months or so – watching for synchronicity, reading books that have jumped out at me, trusting my intuition. And I have found a greater peace than I have ever known. My life is full of the joy of Being and I am growing in compassion toward all things. This is my Path.

English: Detail view on the Great Buddha, Chan...

English: Detail view on the Great Buddha, Changhua, Taiwan (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I am frightened by the power I feel when I am angry. I know that I have the potential to do tremendous harm – emotionally, spiritually, and physically – if I were to harness the power available to me. For this reason, I have made it a priority to learn how to control my anger.

I truly wish to do no harm.

The study of zen practices has helped so much in learning how to control my emotions, and I am currently listening to an audiobook by Deepak Chopra entitled “The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire” which has some wonderful exercises for letting go of anger, along with tools to help understand our inherent power in the universe.

I am learning how to harness all the power in the universe to focus on love, compassion, and healing.  This is my intention. This is what I desire. This is living in love with all things. This is who I will be.

I will be the embodiment of love and compassion.


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